by David Hanson | Nov 22, 2013 | The Youth Ministry Blog
In the past week I’ve become aware of a few of our students who are really hurting. I spent time with one of them yesterday. I picked him up from school and I immediately knew something was wrong. When I asked him, he initially said that nothing was wrong. When I pushed further, the reality came out. Over the course of the next hour we got to unpack some of his struggles.
It’s not often that we can get a middle school guy to open up. Because of this, many youth pastors believe (wrongly) that middle school guys just don’t have that much going on inside. If you talk to parents of middle school guys they will share stories of their sons’ emotional outbursts and roller coasters. We would describe middle school guys as being unemotional or a-motional, but it’s simply not true.
I want all youth pastors who work with middle school guys to reject this stereotype and help middle school guys express their emotions in a healthy, God-honoring way.
Middle school guys’ emotions are real and intense. Youth workers are adults who survived middle school and face big life problems every day. As adults we tend to think that middle school problems aren’t that big of a deal compared to what we deal with. We easily diminish how intense and real the emotions of middle schoolers are. When middle school guys finally open up you realize the opposite is true. When a middle school guy breaks up with a girlfriend of just two weeks it’s still a traumatic experience that affects them emotionally. We need to acknowledge that our guys have more going on inside than they let on.
Middle school guys need permission to express emotions. It isn’t a new thought that our society pressures guys to hide their emotions. In middle school expressing emotions for guys is seen as a weakness that will be exploited or made fun of. As pastors, we need to remind them that emotions are God-given and expressing those emotions is a normal part of life. Are you giving them that message? Are you providing a safe place for guys to open up?
Middle school guys need help identifying their emotions. Brad, now a 25 year old, was a middle schooler playing in a soccer game. I remember him running off the field and immediately bursting into tears. I could tell this this was altogether confusing to him. Most middle school guys don’t know what they are feeling inside. They just know that they are feeling something intense.
Mark Oestreicher reminds us that in early adolescence our emotional color palette is growing in complexity. Middle school guys need help painting with all these new colors. We need to show them how to tell the difference between anger, frustration, bitterness, anxiety, fear and so on. They can learn how to express them in a healthy, God-honoring way only when they know what their emotions really are.
I hope I’ve challenged you to think differently about the middle school guys in your ministry. They are deeper and more emotional than most people give them credit for. They deserve to be taken seriously.
I am far from an expert on this subject. For a more in depth look check out the book “Middle School Ministry” by Mark Oestreicher and Scott Rubin.
Kevin Libick is a Middle School Pastor living in Fort Worth, TX with his wife Kara and her two cats. He is a novice banjo picker and expert Hawaiian food eater. Kevin loves to connect with other youth workers and equip them to live out their calling in God’s Kingdom. Connect with Kevin on Twitter: @kevinlibick
by David Hanson | Nov 21, 2013 | The Youth Ministry Blog
I recently came across this video after my worship guy recommended it to me. I don’t know the back story of the author (Bob Sorge), but I do know this video makes some great points. Would love to hear your thoughts!
1. “Worship has now become an industry.”
2. “Jesus is not an entrepreneur building a business, He is a bridegroom who is after a bride and He is so jealous for her.”
3. “The last thing you want to do is approach ministry like a business. It’s not business. It’s personal.”
4. “It is possible to preach Jesus and proclaim myself.”
5. “After I have finished serving the Bride, is she talking about me or Him?
Questions:
1. Do we approach Youth Ministry as an industry?
2. Have we made it a “business?” Is that wrong?
3. Where do we draw the line between business and ministry?
I want to hear from you! Comment below!
Texas native, Texas Tech Red Raider, M.Div. at Truett Seminary, husband to Ashley, father to Ava, Student Pastor at
LifePoint Church in Plano, Tx, table tennis (ping-pong) extraordinaire, addicted to coffee. For anything else…you’ll just have to ask,
Email David.
by David Hanson | Nov 20, 2013 | The Youth Ministry Blog, Theology
Theology is a misunderstood word in today’s culture. Many times it is used in a derogatory way or because it is misconstrued. To some people, it means a person who is filled with knowledge who loves to debate others. To others it simply means, “the study of God.”
To most, we think of certain “tribes” of people who hold to a certain doctrine. Calvinists, Armenians, premillennialists, amillennialists, and the list goes on and on. Without knowing it, we have put more emphasis into people who wrote about the Bible, than actually studying the Bible.
I’m not a Calvinist or Armenian. I’m a Christ-follower. That is enough for me.
We are all theologians. What? Seriously, Josh? I didn’t go to a specific university or seminary so how am I a theologian? All of us, each day, reveal what we believe. Our actions stem from our beliefs, and where and how those beliefs originate develop a theology.
Simply, theology is the study of God. The implications of studying who God is will have an impact on our lives. Theology dictates what and who we believe in and how we live our life. Eternity hangs in the balance, depending on our theology.
I went to Bible college during my undergrad and went online for my master’s with Liberty University. During my time in Bible college and seminary I noticed that no other word created more fiery debates than “theology.” But what I noticed was that most so-called theologians only wanted to debate secondary issues. The debates I overheard, and admittedly was a part of at times, included a lot of small issues that were blown into large issues.
But each Sunday morning and Wednesday night as I left the dorm room to go serve at a church 45 miles one way, what I noticed was that most of the “theologians” were still in their dorm rooms.
In that moment I realized that your lifestyle reveals your theology.
Anyone can debate, fight and claw to win, but those who actively serve in the mission to seek and save the lost have the right theology.
My friend, if you spend your life trying to find the exact, “perfect” theology but miss the calling to live it out and share Jesus, your theology is dead.
Studying God’s Word is crucial but not just to prepare to win the next argument. Studying God should transform us into the image of God in our humility, passion and love for people. The whole of the Bible could be summed up in two phrases, “Love God, love people.”
Next time you hear the word, “theology,” my encouragement is to stop and think about your lifestyle. Does your theology FIT your lifestyle or does your lifestyle FIT God’s character?
Stop trying to win arguments and start winning people to Jesus by the way you live.
Josh is the student pastor at Church @ The Springs in Ocala, Florida
(www.thesprings.net). Josh has served in student ministry for 9+ years and has a passion to lead students to imitate Christ and influence the world! He has a personal blog at
http://joshrobinson.cc
by David Hanson | Nov 19, 2013 | The Youth Ministry Blog
Surely I’m not the only non-spiritual person who has the tendency to check out of a morning worship service when there’s a guest speaker? At least that’s been my habit. Sometimes I’m all in but most of the time my mind wanders.
“Where’s my pastor this week?”
“What’ll be for lunch later?”
“Why is my fantasy football team so terrible?”
Ok. So maybe I think that when my pastor is preaching too.
This last week we had a guest speaker though who blew me away with a thought that had never crossed my mind:
He said that there have been two times in history when the entire world knew who God was. At first, I was skeptical. How could that be true? Then he hit it: in the garden and after the flood. So at some point, someone dropped the ball. They didn’t pass on the good news. I was so convicted I paid attention during the whole rest of the service!
Thoughts:
How are you ensuring you’re passing on the Good News about Jesus to your family and not dropping the ball?
And
What was something a guest speaker at your church said that really hit home?
Ronald is a follower of Jesus who’s married to Bekah, father to two beautiful girls and a chronic writer. He blogs at
ronaldlong.org and tweets from @ronald_long. When’s he has free time, he plays with his kids, goes for a run, or plays video games. If you’re interested in some of his bible study material, check out
128ministries.org.
by David Hanson | Nov 18, 2013 | The Youth Ministry Blog
Are You On Social Media?
Are you ENCOURAGING your PARENTS to be on Social Media?
If we want to impact the student’s world, we have to get into their world! Just like we get on their turf by going to their games, we need to get on their turf when it comes to social media.
We can influence them greatly by being on social media! If you haven’t noticed these days, students are always looking down at the CELL PHONES. They are always on their phones.
We have an opportunity to IMPACT their world! It is crucial for an Instagram, a Twitter account, and for us to have a Facebook…still.
We should LIVE LOUDER than we PREACH!!
Let them see your family and a glimpse of your life! Use social media to encourage them to read Gods Word or to follow Jesus to the fullest! Encourage your parents to be on social media or at least to check their student’s social media accounts.
Encourage the parents in your student ministry to challenge their students to use social media for the GLORY of GOD! We must be INTERESTED IN, what they are INTERESTED IN! We must CARE about what they CARE about! By us not having social media we lose credibility, trust me on this one.
“When we have social media, they begin to realize He/She gets me or knows my world.”
Michael Hux is the Student Pastor of Team Church in Matthews, NC.
Connect with Michael on Twitter or Instagram: @_Hux
by David Hanson | Nov 15, 2013 | The Youth Ministry Blog
My senior pastor Ted is an amazing leader. He’s been a faithful shepherd and preacher at our church for over 30 years. A year and a half ago he decided that he would up his game and start meeting with a few others to sharpen his preaching skills. This is a man who has preached over 1,300 sermons…1,300. As a man in his 60’s he said “I have yet to preach my best sermon.”
My pastor’s example lit a fire under me. I’ve been in middle school ministry for 15 years and I can be tempted to believe that I have it all figured out. I could rest on my experience and believe that there’s not much left to learn. I could believe those things, but I would be wrong. Ted’s humility inspires me to believe that I have not arrived. I am still a work in progress. The older I get the more I realize that I have so far to go. This thought doesn’t leave me defeated it fuels my fire to learn and hone my skills.
I get older and I get complacent
Ted has every right to sit back and say, “I’ve reached my peak.” No one would blame him for preaching sermons the same way that he’s been doing for years. He’s earned it, right? Wrong. Ted understands that ministry isn’t a destination that you arrive at. The moment you stop growing and learning is the moment your effectiveness diminishes. All of the great thinkers and practitioners in Christian leadership grew better as they got older because they never stopped learning and growing in their skills.
I get older and I get defeated
There are days when I don’t feel as relevant as I once did. There are days when I wish I knew all of the current bands and played all of the new video games. My ability to be on top of the culture must have been connected to my full head of hair because both are long gone. There are days where I feel out of touch and because of that I believe that I am no longer as effective in student ministry. What Ted has taught me is that I can be confident that my relevance is not connected with my effectiveness in ministry. Ted isn’t culturally savvy, but he is a great pastor. His longevity has produced wisdom, character and strength that isn’t present when you’re young.
In the same way, my age in student ministry isn’t a liability. It’s an asset. I don’t know the latest bands, but I can relate to parents a lot better. I may not be as cool as I used to be, but I’m more comfortable in my own skin. Because of these things I can see the horizon and know that my best days are yet to come.
Having a desire for continued growth keeps me from being complacent. Having an appreciation for my age allows me to see that my time is not done. My best days of ministry are not behind me.
In a seminar talking to veteran (read: old) middle school pastors, Scott Rubin and Kurt Johnson said that your best age of ministry is whatever season you are in right now. They meant that it is important to always look at the relative advantages of the season of ministry you are in. In other words there are no “glory days” of the past. The glory days are ahead of you if you keep growing and learning.
Fill in the blank “I have yet to do my best ____________!“ Is it a lesson, event, training or idea? Fill in your blank and then pursue excellence in it for God’s glory and His kingdom.
Stay humble, stay hungry, stay hopeful. Your best years of ministry are ahead of you. I know mine are.
Kevin Libick is a Middle School Pastor living in Fort Worth, TX with his wife Kara and her two cats. He is a novice banjo picker and expert Hawaiian food eater. Kevin loves to connect with other youth workers and equip them to live out their calling in God’s Kingdom. Connect with Kevin on Twitter: @kevinlibick
